When James and I were engaged I was continuously accepting congratulatory remarks from pretty much everyone at all times—and it was 100% fabulous. It was so fun to see everyone so happy for us! Anyway, the same question would always follow all celebratory statements. If they didn’t already know, they’d ask, ”…well, what’s his last name??”
I’ll be honest; I was always kind of a ham about it. The scenario would proceed as follows:
Me: GOLDEN! [Insert sassy / excited / can you believe it!? face here]
Congratulatory Person: OH! His last name is Golden!?!
Me: YES!
Congratulatory Person: You’re going to be Emma GOLDEN?!!”
Me: YES!!!
Squealing, jumping, clapping & shouting ensued, with a few embarrassing and probably uncalled for random dance moves thrown in here and there as well…
I was a just a little [a lot] excited [out of my mind] about marrying James.
Following that I’d prance back to my office with my head in the clouds all over becoming EMMA GOLDEN.
Fast-forward a few months to happily wedded and living in New York. It’s a Saturday in August. On our way out of the apartment we check the mail…and look! My new social security card had arrived to officially declare me “Emma Golden” and finally kick off the process of changing my name.
And somehow in that moment—after all the squealing, jumping and clapping I’d done just a few months before—it all the sudden caught me by surprise.
[Side note—you know, I’m not really very good with surprises. Okay, well gifts as surprises are the bomb, but situations that involve surprise feelings, or surprise change of plans…or, “Surprise! The plane just landed but your connecting flight leaves in 2 minutes. Hope you ran track in high school!” …these are the kind that aren’t exactly on my VIP guest list. I like to be a little more prepared than they tend to allow for]
Anyway, back to that Saturday in August. I know the whole scenario seems goofy since I’m totally the one that submitted the name change forms. I knew this was coming and had been looking forward to it for weeks! But when I held that little piece of paper in my hands [which is unreasonably destructible in light of its significance] I couldn’t help but feel like I wasn’t totally sure who that card belonged to. James was excited—he thought [for good reason!] that I was going to be happy to see it. Instead, I cried. …Surprise!
[Confession: he’s a lot better with surprises than I am…]
After all that commotion over changing my name I started thinking about the process of becoming…
There are a good number of things I’ve already become and accomplished in life that I’m proud of—but of course there are buckets full of lists with characteristics, habits, contributions and qualities that I still hope to develop, dream up, and maintain. [I mean, let’s be real—I’m only 25. We’ve got a ways to go, people!] Life is such a cycle of celebrating what we’ve done while still looking forward to what we’re working to do. [And learning from the things that didn’t work so well along the way.]
And since so much of what you become is based on the things you do [and given my last post about forward movement of sorts] I thought I’d share some goals [with verbs and all!] that I have for the remainder of 2013. Nothin’ crazy, just a few things to keep me on the right track…
So yes. Goals! Here they are. For the world to read.
#1. Run 5 miles without stopping by 11/15/13 – 3 down as of last week, so that seems pretty doable! Let it be known that never have I ever run 5 miles. Thus its significance…
#2. Prepare at least 3 full dinners weekly. We can totes have leftovers for the rest. Baby steps, y’all…
#3. Two new blog posts // month. Because, why not?
#4. Pay all the bills solo by end of 2013. And then make a whole new system. James tends to favor the overly complicated, but I forgive him because he’s SUPER cute.
#5. Have résumé updated & online // all other job search prep stuff done by 12/01/13. The real question: what do I want to do next?? Exciting! [And intimidating] But mostly exciting…
I’m also working on becoming the kind of person who takes her nail polish off when it starts to chip, who has a certain level of clarity about all the clothes she actually owns—and gets rid of the ones she really doesn’t ever wear. Someone who effortlessly obtains the prized paper towel upon her first hand wave in front of the automatic dispenser in the women’s restrooms of Panera—and someone who listens a little more, talks a little less, and never has a second thought about if she should brush her teeth before bed.
…so wish me luck!
His Grace is Sufficient Always.
– E
These Moving Pieces 